I and the Others
And the impact of positive thinking
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In life, we are encouraged, as individuals, to -
Be strong
Stand up for our rights
Demand respect
Demand personal freedom
Speak our mind
It may be coincidence but our society is, at the same time, getting more violent, less tolerant,
more divided. And the less tolerant it becomes, the more extreme the divisions become. The voices
that drive us towards greater individual strength sound louder and louder. Individual independence is
the highest good. However, the greater the division between individuals, so it seems, the more we
are being encouraged to stand up as individuals, to be separate from others. One needs to fight for
what one needs. And you need to fight harder, while at the same time blaming others for the cracks
in society, for you being less tolerant. Whilst proclaiming one wants to unite all people, you divide
into left and right, into good and bad, into true and fake, into for and against.
What is going on?
If you, as an individual, have ‘the right’ to claim whatever you feel you need, then surely
other individuals must possess that same right, no? Or do you consider yourself more special than
others? Do you consider yourself a better human being than others? Are you right and everybody
else is wrong? Or maybe you feel that you are more right because most people in your environment
are of the same opinion as you are, so the others, outside your own environment, must be wrong,
must be stopped. When you get support for what you feel you need, for what you feel is right, does
that then give you the power to be right? What if others also have support for what they feel they
need or for what they feel is right? What might be the result of such a situation? Conflict. And the
more one fights for what one believes in, the greater the conflict becomes. A modern version of the
Holy Wars, whereby in modern society each individual seems to be encouraged to fight their own
holy war. The belief in being the true and only ‘representative’ of the will of an Upperpower, and
being right in defending that belief, has now shifted to the belief in the righteousness of personal
truth. It is all about you, and the others are not allowed to be right within your sphere. You have
become the Upperpower in your life. The King and Master, who decides over war and peace.
Let the battle commence!
Or maybe you are interested in another possibility.
True, each individual has very personal requirements in life, and these will change as life’s
circumstances change. True, each individual has a personal responsibility towards these personal
needs. True, each individual needs to work towards achieving a life that provides as many of those
requirements as possible.
‘As possible’. What makes something possible and what makes it impossible? Maybe we
need to look at the makeup of life, the energetic field in which all these individuals operate. Life is an
energetic process. No energy is lost and no extra energy is produced. The only thing that exist is a
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change in energy. When energy goes one way, it can’t go the other way. When energy is being
accumulated in one place, it is being depleted in another place. If I rule a specific space, nobody else
can rule that space at the same time. If I spend energy on one issue, I cannot spend that energy on
another issue. This would mean that if I spend my energy on fighting, I won’t be able to spend it on
peace. If I spend my energy on being at war with my surroundings, I cannot spend that energy on
being at peace with my surroundings. If I spend my energy on listening to myself I cannot spend that
energy on listening to anybody else.
Energy shifts. So if I pull something in my direction, I am actually pulling it away from
somewhere else. What if that ‘somewhere else’ was holding on to that specific energy and I
wrenched it out of their hands? What if someone else feels they need that energy too in order to
survive? There is only one bone, one food bowl, and two dogs fighting over it. Such a situation only
has three possible outcomes, disregarding the sad possibility that neither gets the bone and a third
one wholly benefits from their fight.
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1. Dog A is the strongest, the cleverest, the most cunning, and gains control over the
bone. Dog B goes hungry, is being deprived.
2. Dog B is the strongest, the cleverest, the most cunning, and gains control over the
bone. Dog A goes hungry, is being deprived.
3. Dog A and Dog B recognise that if, instead of fighting over the bone, they consider
the need of the other and come to ‘an arrangement’, a cooperation, then nobody
goes completely hungry.
The first two options always leaves someone feeling cheated. It is likely they will aim for
revenge after losing the battle. They will think about how to do it differently next time. They will
realise they will need to fight harder, be more alert, in order to meet their own needs. One needs to
be more aggressive, more cunning, more ruthless in order to survive. The other one has now become
an enemy, a legitimate target for future battles. Whatever the future brings for the other one,
whatever will be done to the other one, is now his own fault. He started it because he wasn’t nice to
me when I needed it most.
Working together to try and meet both requirements may not provide you with all you need
immediately, but it will ensure that you do not need to spend energy on being alert, on devising new
ways of approaching the situation, on protecting the borders, on fighting for what you consider to be
yours. All that energy can then be spent somewhere else, whilst in the meantime your life remains at
peace with its surroundings. Your life is not being threatened by the presence of the other.
We do not live as isolated individuals. We are part of a varied ecosystem, which involves all
of nature, including all of human society. Everything we do, but also everything we think and feel, has
a direct impact on the world around us. Trying to pull something towards you, pulls it away from
somebody or something else. To us it may all seem fair, defendable, and necessary but how does the
other side feel about it? What if the shoe was on the other foot? What if somebody was pulling
something away from you, all in good faith, only because he ‘needs’ to? Would you not resist? But of
course that would be different, mainly because you wouldn’t do anything to hurt anybody and you
would only do it if there was no other way? It’s all the other bastards that make life so impossible!
Basically, we can approach life in two ways. Either we believe whatever is happening to us is
done out of malice, out of spite, simply to hurt us, or we believe that things happen for a ‘good’
reason. The value of the latter approach can only be measured if we dare to accept, dare to wait,
dare not to interfere. When we don’t interfere in a process, nature’s processes as well as human
processes, we can observe how that process evolves, where its natural power will take it. This means
we need not to respond, not in anger or fear or hurt, and not in elation or joy or approval. Only then
can we learn what it means that things happen for a reason. Don’t disturb the evidence of the crime
scene!
Every act will elicit a response of some kind. The more violent this response is, the more
waves the response create, the more disturbance has happened during this natural process.
Everything you do changes the world you are living in and that change will be met by resistance. How
much, where and when, may vary. It may not even be clear to you where and what that response is,
but I can assure you, it exists. In fact, every thought, and every feeling you have, changes the
energetic balance within the field you live in. My dog ‘senses’ when I am going to go into the garden
as opposed to anywhere else, even though my actual movements are not directed that way yet. She
never fails! It is simply because I am thinking of going into the garden – thinking about putting on my
shoes, about taking some tools, about the reason for going into the garden – that elicits a response
on her behalf. Those thoughts are changing the balance in my energetic field and she knows what is
coming next. It makes a difference to her, because she wants to take the opportunity to join me into
the garden.
So if my thoughts are, in principle, that powerful then surely I should be able to direct my
environment, using my thoughts, in the way I want it to. As in the example of the dog, if my thoughts
create opportunities for my environment and my thoughts are supporting their systems these will
indeed be felt as power. And this brings us to the power of thought. What is the real power of
thought?
Modern spiritual guidance seems to have taken on this challenge of turning thoughts into
reality. They instruct us on how to concentrate on basic beliefs, formatted as mantra’s. Identify what
is lacking in your life. Turn it into a positive statement. Keep repeating it to yourself over and over
again. Always bring your mind back to that same simple message. If you are suffering because you
have no money, you can change your life by seeing yourself as a rich and wealthy person. If you are
suffering because you consider yourself worthless, you can change your life by seeing yourself as a
strong person, as almost a superhero. If you are suffering because you consider yourself to be a
horrible person, you can change your life by seeing yourself as a kind hearted, generous and
beautiful human being.
The message is ‘change your thoughts and your life will change accordingly’. If it isn’t working
for you then it may be because you are saying these things in your head but your heart doesn’t
believe it. If it isn’t working for you it may be because you are not diligent enough. You need to work
harder at it. If it isn’t working for you it may be for whatever reason but let’s make one thing very
clear: it is your fault. You are the one who is failing. The method for spiritual elevation works. If you
can’t make it work for you then that must be your problem.
Visualisations of all sorts are being used ‘successfully’ in mental health as well as physical
health. You can visualise your cancer away. You can visualise you walking again. And I have witnessed
several of such incredible feasts myself. I know, because I have seen it, that stretching the limitations
of the mind, widening what an individual believes or even bypassing what he believes, delivers
astonishing results. These have been the best performances I have ever been privileged to watch and
to take part in. Imagine yourself the way you want yourself to be and you will become that person.
Perseverance and deep focus will get you there.
And if it isn’t working for you, join the rest of us.
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Don’t despair. Your thoughts do focus your conscious mind in a specific direction. Some say
you can see it as turning a light beam into a laser beam. So you are creating a concentrated energy,
which is always more potent than a dispersed one. However, the content of this energy doesn’t run
deep. It is like a gust of wind over the land. It will move some sand and small items but it won’t shift
the earth. It won’t change the landscape because it is superficial, because it doesn’t run deep enough
into the real fabric of the earth.
Your words, your thoughts, your feelings are produced by your conscious mind. Life is run by
your unconscious mind. It is your unconscious mind that keeps you alive, to the best of its ability
under all circumstances. Your conscious mind lets you know what you want. Your unconscious mind
operates on what you need. What you think or feel you need is a product of your conscious mind.
What you truly need is a product of your unconscious mind. Your conscious mind is a very small
portion your entire mind. Most of it is occupied by your unconscious mind. And aren’t we fortunate
that this is the case? How would your conscious mind know what to do about digesting what you
ingest? How would your conscious mind know what to do when the poison of an insect bite needs to
neutralised and cleaned up? How would your conscious mind know what to do when the pressure on
your inner ear increases?
Your conscious mind creates thoughts and feelings based on what you remember. It has a
data bank of stored information, labelled according to a crude evaluation system that considers past
events as either ‘good’ or ‘bad’, to be repeated or to be avoided. With this guidebook to hand it looks around, imagines what it believes to be around the corner for you, and picks a response based on an old evaluation of a similar, not identical, situation. Now remember, when you are putting your
energy in evaluating a possible future occurrence and a response to that possible future occurrence,
you cannot use that energy to observe what is actually happening. Your conscious mind is ahead of
the game, taking you into what you believe is going to happen to you and the damage you believe it is going to do to your life. You are no longer prepared to wait for the reality to unfold itself.
Your unconscious mind only deals with the reality of the ever changing energy field you live
in. The reality only manifests itself to us when we are not taking a fancy flight into a world of ‘make-
belief’. The situation we find ourselves in shows us the reality of the interaction between the I, as an
individual, and the surroundings of the I. When my thoughts, my feelings, my actions, my beliefs
evoke massive resistance in my surroundings, it tells me I am out of balance with my own world. It
says nothing about who is right or wrong. It only shows me that there is conflict. And yes, I am free to
believe that I am not the cause of the conflict. I am right and the others are wrong. I am free to
accept the evaluation of my conscious mind that the others need to change. I am free in my
conscious mind to believe that I am fighting a just cause. And, in this situation, even though the
others may believe the exact opposite, my conscious mind is not able to connect to their evaluation,
to their opinion, to their belief. Whatever the evaluation of the conscious mind of each individual
may be, the reality, as shown by the unconscious minds of all, is that there exists a conflict between
the two sides. A loss of harmony has occurred between the individual and the world that individual
lives in. This will remain in place for as long as there is no energy dedicated towards finding out what
is going on in the world outside, for as long as the individual does not take notice of what is going on
in his outside world. Conflicts, fundamental differences in opinions and outlooks on life, won’t simply
go away in time. A conflict means that one becomes even more alert to anything else that is
connected to what one sees as ‘the cause’ of the conflict. In other words, over time we become more
distant, more defensive, and more aggressive, in order not to be confronted with more ‘unjust’
situations. All of this is being directed by the conscious mind.
Your unconscious mind takes notice of the energetic changes in your environment. Hence, it
knows what is going on around you. The unconscious mind also takes care of your needs. Those
differ from what your conscious mind perceives as your needs. I hear lots of people say they
wouldn’t be able to survive without this or the other. Really? Try it. What happens? Are you dead? I
don’t think so! Life continues somehow. Why? Because it is your conscious mind that makes you
believe all of this and it is simply mistaken. It is a fantasy. In the meantime, your unconscious mind is
busy finding ways to allow life to continue. That is reality. Your unconscious mind can see that your
life will continue and that there is no real danger. Hence, whilst your unconscious mind, steeped in
the reality of your life, is remaining calm, your conscious mind panics, screams and shouts, but fails
to wake up from the nightmare.
How to change this? The first step is to realise that, no matter what happens, your
unconscious mind is finding ways to keep you alive. Your actual requirements to achieve this are far
less, and greatly different, from what your conscious mind believes. Secondly, your unconscious mind
knows that life can only exist when there are no ongoing conflicts. Hence, your unconscious mind will
strive for peace, will find ways to defuse all conflicts. Life cannot maintain itself in an environment of
constant battling, of constant fear. It requires an understanding, a cooperation, between I and my
surroundings. What if my surroundings are not ‘willing’ to understand me?
What we, as individuals, need to understand is that life, the universe, the entire creation, is
nothing more than reaction upon reaction upon reaction. Every step in creation is a reaction of
elements within the field to the specific conditions in that part of the field. So everything and
everybody responds to something in the environment. Hence, conflict isn’t about who fired the first
bullet. It is about who stops firing bullets. There will always be a reaction. The only question Is how
heavy, how violent, how powerful, it might be. And that depends on how great the difference in
potential is between the two poles. When they are far apart the power of the discharge will be
forceful. When the difference between the two poles is small the impact of the discharge will also be
small. So, the greater the distance between two minds the greater the destruction when they clash,
when they come in conflict with one another. Only avoiding the conflict can avoid the resulting
destruction.
Our conscious mind can not always know in advance what the impact is going to be as we are
not always able to judge properly how strong someone else’s beliefs are, what it truly means to
them. Hence, if you don’t know how far apart you truly are, it may not always be possible to avoid
conflict. However, when the conflict happens the truth will reveal itself to you. The greater the
discharge the bigger the difference in potential between the two of you. The more fierce the reaction
is you are receiving, the greater the threat you are to that part of your environment. And remember,
when you are busy justifying your own thoughts, feelings, actions, you are not busy observing what it
sets in motion outside of you. If, however, you do take notice of the powerful, aggressive, response
from your surroundings you have the opportunity to make a conscious choice between your
conscious mind and your unconscious mind. One that is busy building up the defences of your
position, busy protecting you because it is afraid, and the other that simply wants to live in peace.
You have the choice to focus on defusing the conflict if you are willing to stop arguing who fired the
first shot and is most justified to fight the battle. In other words, on whose side God stands.
It isn’t about who is right and who is wrong. It isn’t about who is the strongest. It isn’t about
winning or losing. It is simply about knowing that perpetual conflict doesn’t serve anybody. So, the
first thing to do is to retreat from the battle field. Leave things as they are. No direct communication
with regard to the subject. Allow the smoke on the battlefield to subside. Secondly, whilst remaining
silent you listen to the other side. One way communication, whereby you only listen and try to hear
and try to understand the other point of view. Thirdly, when the battle stations have been vacated
you hand the other some of the things you have heard him mention he requires and is currently
lacking. You prove you are a friend, a helping hand.
Why is it always me who has to give in?
It isn’t, but that is how your conscious mind would like you to see it. It will only remember
and recall instances where this is the case and pretend it has never been anything else. You don’t
believe this? Fine, then don’t give in. Then continue to fight for your rights, to fight to be right. Then
continue to blame the other for perpetuating the fighting. To your life, to your inner balance, it
doesn’t matter who is right or who is the boss. All that matters is whether you live life in a war zone
or you live it in peace. When you use energy in one direction you can’t use it for something else.
When you use energy to produce bullets, you are not using energy to produce grain.
Life is an ecosystem, which means that no living organism has it all its own way. They all are
dependent upon other forms of life, whether they recognise it ‘consciously’ or not. Living together,
including acute differences of opinions and needs, is the only way nature works. Being constantly at
war with one another is not going to allow life to flourish. Having energy available to intensely
observe your surroundings, so you can help them staying alive, which in turn will help you to stay
alive, should be the aim of every individual organism.
Don’t allow your conscious mind, the poor ‘wounded’ ego, to bring scales to the table to
weigh what you give against what you receive. Your conscious mind is far too restricted and biased in
the way it collects ‘evidence’. If you really want to know the reality, then observe what happens to
you in response to what you radiate. Take responsibility for your part in the process, for your
contribution to the imbalance. And taking responsibility means your main objective must be to help
create peace, simply because you require it the most. Your inner life has limited stretch on it. Your
personal energy reserves are limited. So strive for peace instead of waging war without an end in
sight. So step back out of the minefield by drastically reducing your contribution to the conflict.
Don’t try and force the other into submission, but you yourself be humble. Trust life. Trust
nature. Don’t trust your conscious mind to rule your life. Be a good servant and you will be
appreciated. Pretend you are the boss and you will be feared and shunned.
If being forceful weighs your life down instead of bringing the relief you were seeking, then
stop pushing yourself into trouble.
Know that you can add weight to your life or lighten your life by changing direction of your
own attitude.
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